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“What if I can’t make this work?
What if I fail?
There’s so many things that can go wrong.”
I sprawled on the leather couch, staring up into the ceiling, spewing out these exact words to my counsellor. I let out an exhaustive sigh, defeated before I had even begun.
We get thoughts that pop up in our head based on a memory. If your childhood was plagued by bad experiences of abuse, trauma, arguments and family violence, your brain became programmed to those negative experiences. The repetition and patterns of negative behaviors in a negative environment hard wired your brain to have recurring thoughts even as you get older. And since you get thousands of thoughts every day based on your experiences, you’ll sometimes get these negative memories creep into your headspace, reminding you of those bad times. These reminders can make way for unhealthy behaviors. This is partly the reason behind depression and anxiety because we create these unhealthy thoughts from our past which creates the depression, and we respond with fear and anxiety.
I reached the conclusion that practicing mindfulness is a necessity for trauma survivors. It helps us to re-evaluate our feelings and question the intensity of them. We get triggered much easier and react inappropriately at times
What are some things that you’re grateful for in your life? When we put can place stress on the shelf, it’s so liberating to see the great things in life!
I haven’t blogged in a while primarily because I’ve been focused on publishing my upcoming book, “Living with the Dragon” which will be launched this summer.
I'm Just Jason