What is happiness? The elusive question that every human being pursues at some point in their lives. Some people might answer,
“…money and shopping!”
“…being at peace..”
Scientifically the serotonin and dopamine levels in our brain contributes to our happiness and how it’s sustained which means that money or shopping isn’t really a vehicle for sustained happiness, but if we simply accept that anything that brings a smile to our insides is happiness, then there are no right or wrong answers.
For those of us who go through bouts with depression, the feeling of happiness is sometimes few and far between. It can be elusive and while waiting for the day when we feel happy again can be like waiting for Christmas to come around.
One of the things that I’m learning is that happiness is like any of our other feelings. It’s no different than feeling depressed, sad or frustrated. It’s a feeling that can come and go like a wave sometimes without reason or notification.
If I get used to this idea, then happiness becomes less about a feeling that I need to pursue but becomes something that I know will eventually come and go. My days no longer need to be fixated on finding something that I will never obtain through physical acquisition and therefore less exhausting to my subconscious.
Most of my days I feel content. Not over the top happy, not drudgingly depressed…simply content. This weekend however, I can truly say that I feel…happy!
Maybe it’s because it’s the weekend and it’s finally stopped raining outside. Maybe it’s because my son is feeling happy. Maybe it’s because I’m enjoying my time blogging while listening to music. Maybe it’s because I had a great time with friends this afternoon for lunch. Whatever the reasons, I do wish I can bottle this up and keep it for rainy days (or sell it online for a fortune).
“..happiness is a feeling that is futile to try and pursue. It will always elude us. Instead accept it like all other feelings and know that it will eventually come.”
I don’t know how I’ll feel tomorrow or Monday and at the end of the day it doesn’t matter because being in the moment and accepting how I feel is what really matters. I welcome this feeling of happiness today as I welcome my feelings of depression and loneliness when it comes as well.
When we start looking at our feelings like rhythms or waves, we simply just need to do our best to get a surfboard and ride with it. And sure, I do honestly wish I have more of these happy days than depressing ones but I am optimistic that it is in my future as I gain clearer understanding of myself and continue to accept what I’ve gone through in my life.